Extra Women Secret #2: Sex without Love is Fulfilling

One of the most common cultural myths is that lovemaking is more satisfying than “meaningless” sex. What a scam. Come on, lovemaking can be tedious, too slow, and disappointing. Why do you always have to be in the mood for glow-and-cuddle lovemaking?

Maybe that’s what is wrong at home. No sex, all lovemaking. Where’s the animal attraction? Where’s the not-so-nice bump and grind?

You can try to stay faithful by asking your wife to try new things in bed. She’s probably read an article in a women’s magazine about this. Most of these ideas will seem pretty lame, but maybe if you try her way she will try yours. From toys to dirty talk, you can try some things out. At some point, she may ask if you only want sex or do you want to make love. Ah oh, end of experimentation. Negotiations over. Sigh, make love, and forget about that exciting new sex life. She didn’t even stick with a new position without hinting that sex is bad, love is good.

Oh, well, let’s admit one thing. Half the fun of lust is that you’re lusting after someone new. It’s the newness that accounts for the appeal. You’re going to have to decide what you’re willing to live without, and whether you’re going to die wondering about that Starbucks barista. And her twin sister.

Don’t let anyone tell you there is something wrong with lust. It’s one of the great things about being alive. Don’t you ever let anyone shame you out of such a wonderful feeling!

And dammit, sex without love is perfectly fulfilling. It doesn’t have to feel “empty.” It’s not “meaningless.” Oh and how about “soulless?” The only thing soulless is asking you to live the rest of your life clenching your teeth over unfulfilled desires.

Excerpted from the book, Have a Great Midlife Crisis. Click on button in the upper right corner to preview the book.  Or go to this link:

http://www.lulu.com/content/2951946

Explore posts in the same categories: Self-help, cheating, marriage, midlife crisis, secret lover

Tags: affairs, cheating, fooling around, fun on the side, married and looking, married dating, married men and sex, married sex, men and sex, other woman

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